Ever wondered how to put the brakes on a career in cardiology or [insert medical specialty of choice]? Well, you’re in luck! Here’s a foolproof plan to help you on your way to early career ruination.Step 1: Go on observership with cardiologist. Make sure resident happens to stop by for ‘chat’ with attending (and when I mean chat, I mean sucking up). [Note: For maximal effectiveness, resident should also be Chief Resident]
Step 2: Write and talk about such ‘chat’ with friends and have good laughs all around.
Step 3: Attend small group session led by said Chief Resident.
Step 4: At end of session walk out of class and be sure NOT to check if Chief Resident is walking behind you.
Step 5: Proceed talking about Chief Resident. Be sure to mention their Chiefiness multiple times.
Step 6: Turn around and realize they were behind you the entire time.
Step 7: Run away quickly.
So there you have it, 7 easy steps to a sure-fire one-way trip to a career in something other than cardiology. But in the off-chance this does not work, I suggest running around the Chief Resident shouting ‘yo mama jokes.’
If, however, you do want to become a cardiologist, then please disregard above plan (and may I ask why are you reading this?). In fact, you probably should do the opposite and start some major butt kissing. Also, if you want to be a heart doc but you have followed this plan accidentally (WTF?), then congratulations because:
A) You have exceedingly bad luck and may I suggest that you never gamble
OR
B) You are the hugest idiot in the world and may I also ask how you ever got into medical school in the first place?
If you selected A AND B, then congratulations again, your name must be Stuff.
This has been a public service announcement from Second Opinion.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ll be curled up in fetal position in a closet somewhere, crying myself to sleep.
Okay Truffles, please post something so we can never speak of this again. And if you are said Resident reading this, please understand this is all in good fun. Please don't hurt me... I like your hair and glasses, and you are smart??
3 comments:
I wondered where you and cramberry got to after we all decided that B6-115 was a no-go!!! Ahhh, that is an unfortunate coincidence indeed. But uncurl from the fetal position because I'm pretty sure you haven't ruined your rosy potential career in cardiology.
1) Said Chiefiness (CR) likely DID NOT notice you in the cath lab
2) You likely didn't draw attention to yourself in small group.
3) Therefore when CR heard you talk about him he only saw the BACK of your head (and maybe a glimpse of your horrified face as you ran away) and likely WILL NOT connect you with the anonymous med student in the cath lab nor with the quiet asian girl from his small group.
4) As CR, he is likely in his final year of fellowship - he's on his way out
5) Even if you run into him while interviewing for cardio fellowships (on the offchance that he enters academic medicine at one of the centers you will be applying to) that's 6 years down the road and he won't recognize you. =P
6) Sometimes it's good to be an anonymous Asian female. Eh?
Yes i'm hoping my anonymity works in my favour in this case. Sadly, CR overheard cramberry and I as we were walking to the elevator, so we were less anonymous... what's funny is that he saw cramberry's horrified face as we realized their presence but not mine. And CR is going to be at our school for fellowship (and yes, he is going into that thing i wanna go into) LOL.. with my luck, he'll be my attending during clerkship. And he's marking our assignments! Help!
I thought for a long time of what advice I could give you, or comforting words that will do the trick... and reading Truffle's comment above, I think she's right, highly likely he will not recognize you!
And if you think he somehow miraculously did, just be thick skinned, and pretend it never happen. Time will wash things away, like all the embarasing things of childhood, you look back now and laugh.
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